


Bourbon Hangover

by yasminakohl



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst, Gibbs cries, M/M, Palmer threatens Gibbs, Sad Gibbs, Sad Tony, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-23 20:41:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2554949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasminakohl/pseuds/yasminakohl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony, Bourbon, Basement Songfic</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Godsmack screamed in every room of the house. But standing in the basement Tony felt the music.

No one would ever believe that he listened to this band this kind of music even. Yeah he liked jazz but Godsmack was….God.

So what if I never wanna be sober?  
So what if I wanna be numb all the time?  
I can't justify why I'd wanna go slower.  
Taking my time just ain't my style, yeah.

I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay, with my whiskey hangover.

So what you cleaned your act up so far.  
So what if I'm pissing into the wind, again?  
Have you ever thought that I'm not who you are? (baby)  
'Cause even when I lose I know how to win again. (And again and again)  
So sick of you preaching all the time.  
Just keep your shitty advice inside.

'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay with my whiskey hangover.  
(Oh yeah yeah)  
'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin okay with my whiskey hangover.  
Oh yeah!  
Oh yeah!  
Let's go!

One sip ain't gonna do shit.  
In the second sip I begin to admit  
That the third one down is what makes me feel alright.  
And number four I slam down to the floor.  
By five I'm ready to fight all night.  
And then six, seven, eight to make me break your face  
Sometimes.

'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay with my whiskey hangover.  
Oh yeah yeah.  
'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin okay with my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
Yeah!

The song repeated again and again. Tony looked at the bottle in his hand, it was whiskey but burbon works just fine for getting drunk. He wanted to shatter the bottle against the wall but found he didn't have energy. Sliding down the wall to the floor Tony listened.

He didn't want to be sober anymore. And he did want to be numb all the time. Well yeah he did take his time but it was his to take now. The way he felt right now he was defiantly dead.

Yep defiantly pissing into the wind again, Tony thought as he looked around.

Tony chuckled at the next line, Ha I'm not who I am let alone who you think you are.

Hadn't he always known how to turn the losses into wins. Well he had before…he looked down at the empty bottle of burbon maybe there was more somewhere. He should have grabbed some whiskey so much better for this song.

Listening a little more Tony says to the basement, "It doesn't matter how many I drink it's still all wrong."

"So is the hangover you're going to have in the morning."

"Hmm should get more drunk the basement is talking to me."

"No Tony you should come to bed before the neighbors call in a noise complaint."

A sob escapes Tony's lips. "I don't have a bed. I don't have anything."

Jet sat on the floor facing the man in his basement. "Tony, that's not what I said." He tried to pull the empty bottle from Tony's fingers but the man pulled his hand away and curled the bottle into his chest like a child to protect them from a horrible storm.

Jet knew he broke Tony when he said it was over but he hadn't realized how badly. Looking at the man in tears listening to the same song over and over he wasn't sure why he had broken it off with Tony.

Jet got up and went upstairs, finding the knob to turn down the music, before returning to the basement, he pulled the blanket off the couch and covered Tony with it.

Jet moved a lock of hair from Tony's forehead. Watching Tony sleep of the bourbon hangover, Jet listened to the words of the song playing.

So what if I never wanna be sober?  
So what if I wanna be numb all the time?  
I can't justify why I'd wanna go slower.  
Taking my time just ain't my style, yeah.

I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay, with my whiskey hangover.

So what you cleaned your act up so far.  
So what if I'm pissing into the wind, again?  
Have you ever thought that I'm not who you are? (baby)  
'Cause even when I lose I know how to win again. (And again and again)  
So sick of you preaching all the time.  
Just keep your shitty advice inside.

'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay with my whiskey hangover.  
(Oh yeah yeah)  
'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin okay with my whiskey hangover.  
Oh yeah!  
Oh yeah!  
Let's go!

One sip ain't gonna do shit.  
In the second sip I begin to admit  
That the third one down is what makes me feel alright.  
And number four I slam down to the floor.  
By five I'm ready to fight all night.  
And then six, seven, eight to make me break your face  
Sometimes.

'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin' okay with my whiskey hangover.  
Oh yeah yeah.  
'Cause I walk dead or alive.  
I waste my time whenever I like.  
I'm feelin okay with my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
With my whiskey hangover.  
Yeah!

Jet watched and listened and understood Tony more than he had in years. Wondering if he could salvage what he had broken, Jet pulled Tony off the floor into a fireman's carry and took him to their bed.


	2. Chapter 2

Tony woke up in the bed he had been sharing for years, on his nightstand was a glass of orange juice and two aspirin. He didn't really know what to expect. The team was off rotation for three days.

Friday half way through lunch Jet had pulled him aside and said two words.

"We're done."

"Well, how did we manage to get let go at noon Boss?"

"Not the team, us."

Tony panicked, now he knew what Jet meant, but he couldn't have heard him right, he had to have been wrong. Leroy Jethro Gibbs, second B for bastard, was yes a bastard but even he wouldn't be a big enough bastard to break up with him at work, half way through the day, when he knew Tony had nowhere else to go. Knew he had sublet his apartment years ago, and knew he had sold or moved all of his furniture to Jet's house. Everything he owned was in Jet's house. Everything but the clothes on his back.

Tony had walked away for Jet and had kept walking. He didn't think about anything. He drove for hours and somehow managed to end up at Gibb's house. He couldn't think of it as his house any more, he couldn't think of it as home. It wasn't even Jet anymore. It had to be Gibbs or he would lose it more than he already had.

He didn't remember turning on the Godsmack cd or grabbing the bourbon. He didn't remember walking down to the empty basement.

He did remember the empty feeling, standing in the basement listing to "Whiskey Hangover" over and over.

He did remember Gibb's saying that wasn't what he meant. He wasn't sure what that meant though. We're done, was he thought a pretty cut and dry statement. So how was it that when he now owned nothing, Gibbs didn't mean he didn't have a bed? It didn't matter if he did have a bed, he didn't have a place to put it.

It was a little scary to Tony though, that after so many years of Jet in his head he could switch to Gibbs in just a few hours.

"Speaking or well thinking of the devil." Tony knew the moment Gibbs walked into the doorway of what had been their bedroom. He forced himself not to react, not to show how much his heart ached.

Jethro watched Tony. He knew Tony knew he was there, but Tony's breathing didn't change. He didn't flinch or twitch; this was one of the things that made Tony so good at undercover work. Jethro sighed softly and walked into the bedroom. Both of them were too stubborn for their own good. Jethro decided he was going to have to be the one to give in first since this mess was his fault.

Walking to Tony's side of the bed Jethro kneeled down 'till he was level with Tony. The hurt that showed in Tony's eyes disappeared as soon as it showed. Jethro watch as Tony turned his head to face the other side of the room.

"You can turn away from me. I don't blame you."

"Whatever." His voice was so rough it surprised him. "I'll be gone in a little while. I'll pack a few things and go to a hotel. I'll figure out what to do with my things later. Can I leave them here for the weekend?" Tony's heart broke more with every word he spoke. "I'll get transfer papers from Vance on Monday." He stiffened when he felt the rough palm on his arm. How many times had he relished the feel of those hands on his skin?

"Tony, please look at me."

Even knowing it would sound petulant Tony said it anyways. "No."

"Please?"

"No. Why should I? So you can get one last thrill of seeing me shattered before you throw me out?" Tony barley managed at a whisper.

"I don't want you to go."

Tony rolled onto his side, giving Gibbs his back. "It's too late. I want to go now." Sitting up without looking at the silver haired man, Tony got out of bed "Tell Abby I'll call her when I get settled."

Jethro watched as Tony did everything possible not to look at him. He didn't know what to do. Why had he said it yesterday? Why had he broken it off with Tony after six years?

"I'm sorry Anthony. I don't know why I said that yesterday. I really don't."

"You know what Gibbs I don't care. You kill it with We're done." Tony thought of the Lilly Allen song "You Killed It With I Love You," if only that was the way it worked.

Jethro cringed when he heard Tony call him Gibbs. He hadn't called him Gibbs in the house since the first weekend they were together. "Tony, don't go please. Don't talk to Vance."

"Sounds an awful lot like begging Gibbs." Tony tone was harsh and he was glad he could pull it off as shattered as he felt.

"Do you want me to beg? Do you want me on my knees begging?"

He felt the floorboards vibrate and Tony heard a pop and a thunk as Jet…Gibbs did just that, got on his knees.

"Get up." Tony said trying to keep the plea out of his voice but still not looking him.

"Look at me."

Tony shook his head, his back still to the man who had given him everything and taken it all away.

"Tony."

There was desperation in Je…Gibbs's voice that Tony had only heard once before. It was when J…Gibbs had ordered him to live when he had the plague. Tony fought his own body but in the end, he turned and looked at Gibbs…Jet. "Get up."

Instead of getting up, Jethro walked on his knees to Tony, never breaking eye contact. "I'm an ass, a bastard of unmeasured bounds."

"These are things I already knew."

"I love you."

"That is something I thought I knew to the core of my being." Tony whispered.

"I screwed up."

"Why?"

"I don't, I…" Jethro tried to understand all night why he had said those words to Tony yesterday, and 16 hours later, he still didn't know. "I don't know."

"If you don't know why you wanted to end something after 6 years, then you don't know why you want to keep it either Gibbs."

Jethro was not one to cry, when Shannon and Kelly where killed was the only time he could remember. But right now every time he heard Tony call him Gibbs that was all he wanted to do. "Don't go."

"I can't stay here." Tony answered his voice still gravely from sleep, bourbon, and pain.

"Yes you can. I'll go. I'll stay in a hotel until I…"

"Until you want? Figure out what the hell you where thinking?"

"Yeah." Jethro said softly.

"Fine whatever, just get off your damn knees before you can't move for a week."

Jethro got up but kept a smile hidden, Tony still cared enough to worry about his stupid knee.

"And no I don't care about your knee, I wouldn't want you to get Tim or Ziva killed though." Tony said walking out of the bedroom to the bathroom slamming the door behind him.


	3. Chapter 3

Swallowing Jethro grabbed the extra 'go bag' he always kept backed. Turning towards the bedroom door, he stopped and walked towards the bathroom instead. He heard the water running for the shower. He dropped his head to the door and sighed heavily. Why in god's name had he done this to Tony? Placing a hand on the door Jethro sighed once more and pushed away from the door.

Pulling out of the driveway Jethro wasn't sure where he was going to go. Thinking he should find a hotel close incase Tony called him; Jethro drove to the first one he passed. Walking to the desk however, he found they were booked, the next four where the same way. Giving up he drove to the Yard. He would just use Abby's futon.

When he pulled into the Yard, Jethro felt drained, more drained than he had in a long time. The parking lot was emptier than usual but given that it was 6 am on a Saturday that was fine. Walking past the security guard and not even bothering to acknowledge the man, Jethro made it to the elevator.

Getting off the elevator at Abby's lab, Jethro stopped. The lights were on and Abby's music blared away. Why was Abby here at 6 on a Saturday? Even though he wanted to know the answer that question, he didn't want to have to answer ones from her. Getting back on the elevator and going down to autopsy, Jethro figured he would use Ducky's office.

Looking around the morgue, Jethro saw no indication that anyone was in. Walking over to the office he barely missed having a door in the face.

"Jethro good god man what are you doing here? You gave me a start. Please tell me you have gotten some sleep in the last 48 hours. You look dreadful."

Ignoring everything Ducky had just said Jethro asked, "Are you using your office?"

"No."

"I'm using your couch." Jethro edged by the ME and dropped his pack on the couch to use as a pillow.

"Why are you here?"

"Can't be home." Jethro answered trying to be his usual gruff self.

"Why?" Duck pushed.

"Stuff going on."

"Doesn't stuff require attention?"

"Not at the moment."

"Am I going to have to stitch up another seven iron attack Jethro?"

Jethro shrugged, "Least I would deserve this one." He had hoped he had said that quietly enough the ME didn't hear the comment.

But Ducky missed very little, "And what Leroy Jethro Gibbs did you do to deserve a golf club attack?"

"Duck, you're not my father so no Leroy."

"Then answer me."

"I broke it off."

"And that deserves a tee off?"

"Gibbs how could you?" Abby said from Ducky's doorway.

"How could he what Abby?" Ducky asked turning to the Goth.

"Abby I don't know."

"You have to fix it."

"I tried. I offered to leave because I was making it worse."

"FIX IT!" Abby stormed out forgetting the sample in her hand.

"What does Abby know that I do not Jethro?"

"She knows who Gibbs is dating." Palmer said standing behind Ducky. "Agent Gibbs, You will fix this or Abby is going to have help hiding the body."

"Mr. Palmer." Ducky exclaimed, in all the years Jimmy had been working with Ducky he had never once stood up to Gibbs and in one moment, he not only stood up to him, he threatened to hurt him. With the look on his face, Ducky knew Jimmy was serious, deadly serious. Astonished as he was Palmer made it out of the morgue and into the elevator before Ducky came to enough to demand he explain everything.

Turning back to Jethro Ducky was again astonished. Jethro was sitting on his couch in tears.

"I got to fix it Ducky but I don't know how."

"What is going on? No more cryptic answers. Who is it you have been dating that both Abby and Mr. Palmer about. Is it Ziva?"

"No it is not Ziva." said the former Mossad agent.

"Does everyone know this but me?" Duck said exasperated. "And why in god's name are you all in my office at 6 in the morning?"

"Ask him." Ziva said pointing to Gibbs. "And he will fix it or there will be little for Abby and Palmer to hide."

"Jethro, before Tony or Timothy come in here and threaten you, you better tell me who you're dating."

At the mention of Tony's name Jethro lost what little control he had left. The man who could wait for a shot for days, the man who could break a suspect in minutes, shattered.

Shaking his head Ducky realized who his friend had been seeing, "Oh Jethro, what have you done?"

"Killed the best thing in my life since Shannon."

Ducky looked at his friend and want to head slap the man. Giving into temptation Ducky did just that. "You are a bastard."

"I know."

"Why, wait how long have you been dating Tony?"

"Six years."

"Before or after Mexico?"

"After, it was one of the reasons I came back. After I got things figured out in my head and accepted that they were gone again."

"Now I ask again why?"

"Why Tony or why did I break it off?"

"Both."

"Why Tony, because he makes me laugh, reminds me that life is suppose to be lived not just an existence. He reminds me of who I was with Shannon, but I don't see him as a replacement for Shannon. I never have."

"If I may ask are you homosexual or bisexual?"

"Tony is the only man who I've ever been attracted to."

"Abby would probably coin some term like Tonysexual." Ducky joked lightly. "Why did you tell the others and…"

Jethro interrupted, "We didn't tell anyone. I don't know how they knew or even when they found out. Tony might have said something to Abby but I'm sure he would have told me."

"You have neglected to answer the second question Jethro."

"Because I don't know."

"You don't know why you broke off a 6 year relationship? Jethro how can you not know? You had to have reasons."

Shaking his head Jethro stood up and began to pace the small room. "I just, I…" His phone rang. "What the hell we're not on rotation.

Gibbs.

Tony." Jethro's voice dropped to a horse whisper. "No, I'm at Ducky's office. Yes, I know after five no vacancies; I figured the Yard was a guarantee.

Sure." Silence. Gibbs looked at his phone. No one ever hung up on him.

"Now you know what it feels like Jethro."

"What am I going to say to him Duck?"

"What after 6 years scared you?"

"I woke up yesterday and I just felt…trapped." Jethro's shoulders dropped so far down Ducky worried about an anatomically impossibility of them hitting the floor.

"Well Jethro you need to figure out why you suddenly felt trapped and how you handled it."

"I didn't handle it."

"What did you do?"

"I told him we were done. He thought I meant the team was done for the day. When I told him no us, he left. I went to the gym and worked out for hours. When I got home he was in the basement listening to some song about a whiskey hangover while being drunk on bourbon."

"Ah, Godsmack."

"Do I want to know why you know the band's name? Or that you know that that song is by them?"

"I am a man of many facets Jethro." Patting his friend on the shoulder Ducky stood up and opened his office door. "Go fix what you have made a mess of my friend."

"Before I left he said I killed it with We're done."

"Hmmm Anthony has as varied a collection of music as he does movies. That would be a twist on Lily Allen's Sunday Morning."

"He called me Gibbs Ducky. He hasn't called me Gibbs at home in 6 years."

"Dear boy you have some things to deal with. I think it is time for you to go home and work them out with your partner."


	4. Chapter 4

Jethro pulled into the driveway and sat in the car. If you asked him, he wouldn't tell you he was afraid but he defiantly was not feeling brave.

Trying to shake the dread that had been building since he woke two nights ago, Jethro got out of the car and walked to the house he had shared for six years.

Reaching for the knob, he dropped his hand to his side, why had he felt so trapped two days ago? He couldn't face Tony without that answer. Though there was no excuse for how he handled things, he needed a reason. Tony was right if you don't know why you were going to stop something you can't keep it going either.

Dropping down on to the porch, Jethro thought back threw the weeks trying to think of something that had changed in their relationship. But there was nothing, they had done what they have always done. They worked cases, came home, ate, slept. They had been so tired they hadn't even had sex.

Then it clicked. He had been hit in the chest, directly over his heart. The vest he argued with Tony about that day had stopped it. Tony had hovered giving him 'I told you so' looks all afternoon.

The first time he was shot in combat he was sent home to recover, Shannon had hovered. It hadn't been that bad of an injury but the doctors figured he would feel better recouping for a few weeks at home with his pregnant wife than in a hospital in Germany. Realistically he hadn't needed more than a week but the doctors didn't want him going back into the field until the wound was healed so there wouldn't be any chance of infection.

Shannon, whether it was fear of losing him or hormones from the pregnancy, had been under foot the whole three weeks he was on medical leave. They had never been the type of couple to argue but they did those 21 days. 21 days, 21 years ago. Kelly's birthday would be in another 6 weeks. They had been gone 13 years. And Jethro had gone from one bed to another really.

Had he ever really been alone…he went from Shannon to…Jethro couldn't even bring himself to say her name even to himself, then to Diane who oddly enough he could name. Then Jenny, Stephanie and more he wouldn't name then, Tony and Hollis and back to Tony.

With a gasp, an unmanly one at that, Jethro called himself what he had been since Shannon's death… "Slut."

"That's an interesting opening to an apology." Tony said standing in the porch light.

"What? No, no god Tony not you."

"I don't see anyone else around for you to insult."

"I was talking about myself." Jethro said quietly.

"I see, so you broke it off after six years to sleep around and now you're regretting it." Tony turned around to leave, his stomach rolling at the thought of Jet cheating on him even if they were split up, sort of.

"No Tony don't go no wait stop please." Jethro tried to scrabble up to go after Tony but he had been sitting on the porch a lot longer than he realized. His knee seized then gave out. If Tony hadn't heard the pop and turned around Jethro would have gone ass after teakettle down the few stairs there were leading to his...their door.

"Damn it Jet what the hell do you think you're doing?" Tony pulled the man up and Jethro got his good leg under him and leaned on Tony's shoulder. He knew he had no right to do it but he needed to see if Tony would dump him on his well deserving ass. When Tony didn't Jethro took a deep breath, "I can make it to the couch if you don't want to help me."

"Too late you're already draped over my shoulder might as well get you there in one piece." Tony wanted to weep at the feeling of Jet in his arms again oh all right on his arm but really.

The pair took it slowly and when Jethro was sitting on the couch Tony pulled the coffee table over and but his leg up on it and then disappeared into the kitchen. A moment later Jethro heard ice moving around and he almost cried Tony still cared enough to get ice so his knee wouldn't swell too badly.

Pulling himself together before Tony returned Jethro took a deep breath and waited.

Tony set the bag of ice on his knee and just kept looking at the bag.

"Tony look at me."

"I can't."

"I'm sorry for this, all of this. You didn't deserve any of what's happened, it was all me."

"Who are they?" Tony said just loud enough for Jethro to hear.

"Who is…they who?" Jethro said suddenly confused.

"Whoever you've been sleeping with…how…" Tony swallowed back his emotions. "How long have you been sleeping with them?"

"No, Tony what I said on the porch..."

"You called somebody a slut."

Jethro reached out and tried to lift Tony's face up so he could see those wonderful green eyes…Tony resisted for a moment but ultimately gave in a let Jethro raise his chin 'till he saw his loves eyes.

"Tony I was talking about me."

"Gi…Jet you've been with a handful of people, seriously stop pulling this crap and just tell me who it was."

Putting a hand on each side of Tony's face Jethro leaned in to make sure Tony understood what he was saying…"Yes I have been with a small number of people and you…"sliding his hand under Tony's chin "you are the last person I was with. What I said on the porch was well, was my realization about why I," taking a deep breath, "why I was a complete idiot."

"So how is it that you're a slut when you've only been with…"

"Well just leave the number out of this alright? The how is not the number of people but how close they followed each other."

"So what we were all rebound fucks?" Tony's statement dripped with sarcasm and was on the verge of hate.


	5. Chapter 5

"No well no, I don't know damn it. Tony you know I don't do feelings. I don't, I god this is so messed up I don't even know how to begin to straighten it out, let alone fix what I've done."

"Let's try with you telling me what the hell is going on Jet? You apparently came up with something while you sitting on the porch, what was it?"

"I haven't been along for any length of time since Shannon and Kelly died. There was always someone there."

"So you think that makes you some sort of man slut?" Tony growled.

"Tony," Jethro sighed, "Tony the other day, when…when I was shot a few things changed. I god," Jethro took the ice bag of his knee and got up to pace. "21 years ago I was shot in combat, they sent me home to recover so I could spend time with Shannon before Kelly was born. She hovered the whole time. We had never argued, never. But those 21 days that's all we did. Three weeks before Kelly was born I had to go back to my unit. When I got the call that Shannon was in labor I was so happy, so excited that I forgot all about the arguments. I got leave and made it home literally minutes before Kelly was born. Shannon forgot about the argument to."

"Jet I know thinking about them hurts but you can't keep taking it out on me." Tony said quietly from the couch.

"Tony I didn't even know what was wrong, what I was doing until I was out there." Gesturing to the porch. "They know."

"Who knows what?" Tony asked confused again.

"The team everyone, even Palmer."

"Oh." Tony's mind reeled. How did they all figure it out he and Jet had always tried to be so careful. DADT wasn't enforced considering they were not military but since they dealt with the military they kept it to themselves.

"I was told a few times to fix this or Abby wouldn't have to kill me. The others would do it for her."

"Oh."

"Palmer and Ziva both, Ducky didn't know but once he did and found out what I had done..."

"What did McGee say?"

"He wasn't there. I don't know if he knows but if he doesn't and Palmer does, I think maybe he should go back to FLETCE."

"Jethro why couldn't you just tell me what was going on? I thought we trusted each other enough to talk about this kind of thing?"

Jethro was happy that Tony had stopped calling him Gibbs but was sad that he had only made it to Jethro. Looking at his lover sitting on the couch face burred in his hands, Jethro's heart broke, what had he done.

"Tony when I saw you in the hall the other day that wasn't what I was going to say to you. I I don't even know what I was going to say to you because it was gone as soon as I said it was well what I said. There were no plans no thought process behind it. It was totally reactionary."

"All weekend you had been distant you slept under the damn boat for the first time in years." Tony said exasperated. This time Tony was the one to pace. Only Jethro noticed each path was closer to the door than the last.

Jethro knew he needed to do something but hell if he knew what it was. Deciding not to think anymore Jethro just acted he stood up swiftly and grabbed tony swinging him around until they were face to face and Jethro kissed Tony.

"I do love you. I will always be a bastard. I have been trying to live my life with you but I am going to mess it up. I can't take back what I said but I will wish until my last breath that I never said it. I will try to be better about feelings about Shannon and Kelly but I'm sure the will blindside me and I will fail." Jethro spoke all those words with his forehead rested on Tony's. He wanted to look at the man but he was afraid that his words would be too little too late.

"Jet I know you never see these things coming but when they happen talk to me. Even if it's just to say, I need to work through some things about the girls. I'll understand. If you need space or time or whatever I'll do what I can to give you what you need. Just don't shut me out…don't cut me out." Tony stepped back a little and tugged on Jet's hand. "Come on I haven't slept well and we have to work tomorrow."

Jethro followed Tony to their bed. Thanking any god that cared to listen that it was STILL their bed. He knew he need to work on repairing what he had broken with Tony but he was nothing if not good with his hands.


End file.
